You know what I would have liked to do on Sunday when the weather was grand? Go for a bike ride. You know what I had to do instead? Drive all over the damn state looking at beat up old cars to buy. And you know what got in the way of getting that miserable task done? Some neighbor of mine called the town to complain about my failure to clear the sidewalk in front of my house, so the cops came and told me to do it, so I had to do it.
Now, I know what you're saying. You're saying, "Cry me a river, El Prez. It is your civic duty to make the sidewalks passable, and as an advocate of non-motorized transportation, you, of all people, should take this sacred trust seriously." To that I say, Fair enough, but peep this: My house in on a corner and there are sidewalks on two sides. On one side, the sidewalk connects to the rest of the block and is used by schoolchildren on their way to, you know, school. On the other side, the sidewalk dead-ends at my driveway and there is no more sidewalk on the rest of the block. (See diagram below; click for larger, legible size.)
So I cleared the sidewalk that goes somewhere and left the sidewalk to my driveway completely unshoveled. Why? Because if that part is unshoveled, you have to walk in the street, but if it's shoveled, you still have to walk in the street, because there are no sidewalks on the block!. But apparently, that's not good enough for some suckers, so I had to spend a couple hours chiseling away at the six inches of ice that had accumulated under the foot and a half of snow. And for what? So that some people get to walk thirty feet more on a sidewalk before they have to go in the street, which, by the way, they can only do by trespassing across my driveway. I am strongly tempted to build a little wall on my driveway at the end of the sidewalk, just to spite the trife individual who complained. But then the mail wouldn't get delivered.
Honestly, I just want to be done shoveling and scraping and buying a stupid car and get to the important business of riding my bike around. I totally need Voltron right now.
Monday, February 2, 2009
Posted by El Presidente de China at 9:32 PM